Driving Across the Country

The oscillation of my emotions
is far more than I bargained for.

But the beauty of it all
cannot be captured by
words, pictures, paintings.

It can only be felt,
deep in your bones,
the bottom of your heart,
the innards of your brain.

It touches your soul so purely,
you can do nothing but ride the wave,
feel as children feel…

and fall in love all over again–

California Spirit

Winding Redwood forest roads,
In colorful California, carving through the
Steep, potentially collapsable mountainside.

A perfect balance of hot and cold,
Mountains and coastline,
Wilderness and civilization.

Coming to this place feels like
Everything is teetering on the edge of life and
Death, but that’s the excitement we crave!

California is the sun’s playground;
It is where the world’s eternal children come to
play for the rest of their lives.

And much like this life,
We’ve got to have as much fun as possible
Before it all disappears into nothingness.

So play on flower-children, sun enthusiasts, water worshipers, Mountaineers, gold diggers, fantasy dwellers, reality repellers;
Each and every one of you–

Play on ’til death do us part!

Waking Up

I keep telling myself that I’ll be fine,
but something is amiss,
is it religious bliss?

Maybe I need a Miss
so I can get kissed,
or remind me that I’m missed.

Trapped in a bed that’s not even mine
I’ve been put down too many times,
Lived too many lives, lost too many loves,
but I’ll be fine.

I tell myself that I love myself–
Is it really true?
Will I ever be myself without you?

I’m dying to find the answer–
sometimes it feels like cancer
swelling in my throat
hearing nothing except a croak.
I’ll be fine.

Superego instills doubt in my mind
Am I really fine?
I’ll just keep to myself–

Keep wearing my “plastic” smile
struggling to share my feelings with
the ones who care about me.

I’m know I’m not fine,
but I will be only when the closed chambers
of my heart open once again.